No Chump Change for Illegals

It is often thought that illegals have to settle for the worst paying jobs in American society when they first arrive.

That is not the case at all!

If they come as the fifth, sixth or seventh wave of illegals in this family as Mr. Kim Shuk, South Korea,  pictured here, did.

Mr. Shuk was able to get a loan from his illegal predecessors and set up a successful telecommunications company, hiring fellow Korean illegals for the IT portion and Hispanic illegals for the grunt work.

It it not that Mr. Shuk could not find qualified Hispanic engineers, he just wanted to keep the high paying jobs for 'cousins" of his own country.

Mr. Shuk was left making $2 million a year and the Hispanics were making about as much in this piciure.

LESSON - ALL ILLEGALS DON'T STICK TOGETHER. MR. SHUK WAS NOT A MEMBER OF ASSI.

JOINT THE AMERICAN SECRET SOCIETY OF ILLEGALS SO THAT WE CAN HELP YOU, NO MATTER IF YOU ARE HISPANIC, ASIAN OR AFRICAN!!!!

Head of Secret Illegal Society Answers Member Questions

Dr. Juan Muhammed Kim, Esq.

Executive Director of the American Secret Society of Illegals;

1601 Pennsylvania Ave NW

Washington DC 2001

Ain't he handsome?

Today, Dr. Muhammed Kim goes online to answer ASSI member questions.

Our first question is from Idi Muhammed al Sack, a proud illegal of 13 years from Syria.

Mr. Al Sack said that he was waiting in the check out line of a gourmet supermarket paying for $330 of groceries, including many pastries, with food stamps, when the 10-year daughter of an American citizen in the line behind him started crying when her mother told her they couldn’t afford a quarter of what Mr. Al Sack was buying, especially desserts. Mr. Al Sack felt very aggrieved and wonders if he can sue anybody.

The answer, Mr. Al Sack, is I hope you had enough foresight to get the name and address of the mother, because you can certainly sue her as well as the store.

The store is obviously guilty of failing to provide users of food stamps, especially illegal aliens, with a zone of comfort to buy your caviar, wild salmon, chocolate mousse and other necessities of life without being harassed by citizens, who should be thankful that they only have to pay taxes for your foodstamps and that we don’t kick them out of the country … yet.

That lawsuit should be good for a $2 million settlement.

The mother obviously is guilty of fomenting anti-foreigner feeling in her daughter by not educating her that it is the duty of Americans to pay for foodstamps for foreigners, especially illegals. You should be able to get her house and all of her cars, except for one, and that daughter’s college fund. Congratulations, Mr Al Sack. We illegals must be eternally vigilant for ways to sue Americans.

And don’t worry, wink, wink, civil courts are forbidden to ask about the residency status of anyone suing. Isn’t this a great country, or what?

Our second question comes from Halldor Guojohnsen, a native of Iceland living illegally in the United States for six years. Mr. Guohohnsen writes that when he came to the U.S., the Icelandic currency was vastly overvalued and he was able to live like a king here. Now, with the collapse of the Icelandic government and his currency, he wonders if he must get a job?

No, no, no, Mr. Guojohnsen. The U.S. government is liable for failing to see that the Icelandic economic boom was really a classic financial bubble that would burst one day. They should have been converting your currency to gold and putting it aside for you.

You must first apply immediately for welfare, citing the reason that with your Icelandic fair skin that only knows the Artic sun, it is dangerous for you to go out into the streets of America even to look for work, much less hold a job that even forcing you to commute, will shine more deadly sun rays on you in a month that you would get in your entire lifetime in Iceland.

Once you are on welfare, we can set you up with a lawyer who will assist you in suing the American government for their flagrant disregard of the reckless behavior of Icelandic banks. Thank you.

Shout Out to All Illegals - VOTE EARLY! VOTE OFTEN!

Election Day is Coming!

Alert to All Illegals - You Must Go to the Polls!

Then, if you have followed our previous advice, all of you dear members of the American Secret Society of Illegals, you have all registered at least 10 times, and hopefully, 20. You have also encouraged all of your illegal friends and family members to do likewise.

The previous advice made this an easy process for you, and now you must get out there and ... music please ...............................

VOTE EARLY! VOTE OFTEN!

You will be as happy as this gentleman, an honored member of ASSI.

Of course, you must all vote for Obama.

We know that John McCain will equally support amnesty for all illegals as long as we, 'wink, wink,' promise to let the government close the borders, and we halt our relatives from joining us.

But ASSI firmly believes that Barack Obama, combined with an overpowering majority in both Houses of Congress, will open the floodgates to illegals, grant more amnesties every year, and fast-track us all to citizenship, because they know that 99% of us will vote Democratic.

If anyone analyzes the vote of people who were citizens of the USA in 1965 and their descendants, they will have voted overwhelmingly Republican.

That was the year, of course, that the last overwhelmingly Democratic Congress, along with Dem Prez Lyndon Baines Johnson, passed the immigration reform law that actually discriminated against immigrants from Europe and open the frontiers to folks from Asia, Africa and Latin America, and allowed all of them, for the first time, to bring in their moms and pops, brothers and sisters, uncles and aunts and even first and second cousins.

HIP-HIP-HOORAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We all know where post-1965 citizens go to vote, as this photo shows.

Our future is secure!

We want to emphasize the importance of all ASSI members calling their friends and family members between now and election day and getting them out to vote the minimum 10 days.

Vote early, so we can watch those fool Americans line up in two-hour queues on Election Day, so proud of casting their one miserable vote, so trusting that all of their fellow Americans and illegal neighbors would never think of voting more than once.

Of course, if we don't get our way, here is what we'll do to the Americans !

We will be posting information immediately after Barack's election is official on how we will start re-organizing the country once we become the majority, and what we will do with the remnants of the old Americans.

We have only to thank their own ignorance that none of them remember what Ben Franklin told a woman, when she asked him what the members of the Constitutional Assembly had given them, after they had completed writing the document but before the issued it to the states and the general republic.

"We've given you a republic, Ma'am ... if you can keep it!"

Well, it will have lasted 230 years or so ... That's long enough,

ASSI FOREVER!!!!!!!!